Accountant, CPA, and IRS Jokes

Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and an accountant?
A: The accountant knows he is boring.

Q: How was copper wire invented?
A: Two accountants were arguing over a penny.

Q: What's an auditor?
A: Someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.

Q: When does a person decide to become an accountant?
A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

Q: What's the definition of a good tax accountant?
A: Someone who has a loophole named after him.

Q: What's an extroverted accountant?
A: One who looks at your shoes while he's/she's talking to you instead of his/her own.

Q: What's an accountant's idea of trashing his/her hotel room?
A: Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.

Q: What's a shy and retiring accountant?
A: An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's/she's retiring.

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