Job Hunting and Human Resources Jokes

Resume Mistakes

ON REASONS FOR LEAVING THE LAST JOB:

Responsibility makes me nervous. They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn't work under those conditions. Was met with a string of broken promises and lies, as well as cockroaches. o I was working for my mom until she decided to move. The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers.

ON JOB RESPONSIBILITIES:

While I am open to the initial nature of an assignment, I am decidedly disposed that it be so oriented as to at least partially incorporate the experience enjoyed heretofore, and that it be configured so as to ultimately lead to the application of more rarefied facets of financial management as the major sphere of responsibility. I was proud to win the Gregg Typeing Award. I am a take-charge individual who is not afraid to take on upper management in order to further my career.

ON SPECIAL REQUESTS & JOB OBJECTIVES:

Please call me after 5:30 because I am self-employed, and my employer does not know I am looking for another job. My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I have no training inmeteorology, I suppose I should try stock brokerage. I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant.

ON PERSONAL INTERESTS:

Donating blood. 14 gallons so far.

ON SMALL TYPOS THAT CAN CHANGE THE MEANING:

Education: College, August 1880 - May 1984. Work Experience: Dealing with customers' conflicts that arouse. Develop and recommend an annual operating expense fudget. I'm a rabid typist. Instrumental in ruining entire operation for a Midwest chainoperation. Strong interest in pubic issues.

Jump to Job Hunting Joke Number:
| 5 | 10 | 15 | 20 | 25 |
| New Job Hunting Jokes |