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Engineer Jokes


The Engineering Song - Part I


We are, we are, we are, we are, we are the Engineers
We can, we can, we can, we can demolish forty beers
Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum, drink rum and come along with us
For we don't give a damn for any damn man who don't give a damn for us.


Godiva was a lady who through Coventry did ride,
To show to all the villagers her lovely bare white hide;
The most observant villager, an Engineer of course,
Was the only one to notice that Godiva rode a horse.

I've come a long, long way she said, and I will go as far,
With the man who takes me from this horse and leads me to the bar.
The men who took her from her steed and stood her to a beer,
Were a bleary-eyed Surveyor and a drunken Engineer.

A maiden and an Engineer were sitting in a park
The Engineer was busy doing research after dark,
His scientific method was a marvel to observe,
While his right hand write the figures, his left hand traced the curves.

My father was a miner in the northern Malamute
My mother was a mistress in a house of ill repute
The last time I saw the both these words rang in my ears
Get out of here you Son of a Bitch and join the Engineers.

The army and the navy boys went out to have some fun
Down to the local tavern where the fiery liquors run
But all they found were empties for the Engineers had come
And traded all their instruments for gallon kegs of rum.

An artsy and an Engineer found a gallon can
Said the artsy match me drink for drink and see if you're a man
They took three drinks, the artsy fell, his face was turning green
But the Engineer drank on and said: "It's only gasoline."

Caesar set out for Egypt at the age of fifty-three
He hung about with Cleopatra whose heart was young and free
And every time that Caesar said "goodnight" at three o'clock
There was a Roman Engineer waiting just around the block.

On reading Kama Sutra, a man learned position nine
For proving masculinity it surely was divine
But then one night the girl rebelled and kicked him on his rear
For he was a feeble artsy and she was an Engineer.

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