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Secretary Jokes
Secretary Jokes


Mr. Robert Johnson got himself a new secretary. She was young, sweet, and very polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open.

When leaving the room, she said, "Mr. Johnson, your barracks door is open." He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open.

He decided to have some fun with his secretary. Calling her in, he asked, "By the way Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door was open this morning, did you also notice a soldier standing at attention?"

The secretary, who was quite witty replied, "Why no sir, all I saw was a little disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags."

Several weeks ago, we hired a new blonde secretary who wasn't the brightest crayon in the box. One day when she was typing, she turned to another secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"

"Just use the copier machine paper," the other responded.

With that, the blonde took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier, and proceeded to make five blank copies.

A guy walked into his friend's office, he found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. "Hey, what's up with you?" he asks.

"Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She's hired a new secretary for me."

"Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?"

"Neither, He's bald..."

"That new girl in the typing pool is driving me crazy!" bemoaned Rich to Ernie. "That girl is a real mirage."

"Aren't you using the wrong word?" asked Ernie. "A mirage is something you can see but can't feel."

"Yeah," came the reply. "That describes her exactly!"

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