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Two doctors opened offices in a small town and put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Psychiatry and Proctology." The town's fathers were not too happy with that sign, so the doctors changed it to: "Hysterias and Posteriors." This was not acceptable either, so they changed the sign to: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids." No go, so they tried: "Catatonics and High Colonics." Thumbs down again, so they tried: "Manic-depressives and Anal-retentives." Still not good, so they tried: "Minds and Behinds." Unacceptable again, so they tried: "Lost Souls and Ass-holes." Still no go. Nor did: "Analysis and Anal Cysts," "Queers and Rears," "Nuts and Butts," "Freaks and Cheeks" or "Loons and Moons" work either, so they finally settled on: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones, Odds and Ends." Three men met at a party, and it wasn't long until the conversation got around to their line of work and what kind of cars they drove. "I'm a veterinarian," said the first fellow. "So, naturally, I drive a white 'Vet." As they smiled and nodded, the second man said, "I own a sign company, so I drive a purple Neon." Now the third guy was suddenly quiet until he was egged on by the other two. "Well," he finally said, "I'm a proctologist ... and I have a brown Probe..." An older gent had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. He approached the receptionist desk. The receptionist was a large imposing woman who looked like a wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice the receptionist said, "Yes, I see your name here. You want to see the doctor about impotence, right?" The heads of all the patients in the waiting room snapped around, to look at the very embarrassed man. He recovered quickly though, and in an equally loud voice replied, "No, I've come to inquire about a sex change operation ... and I'd like the same doctor that did yours!"
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