Doctor Jokes and Medical Humor

Actual Doctors' Notes on Patient Charts

Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely.

She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993.

The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

The patient refused an autopsy.

The patient has no past history of suicides.

Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.

Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

She is numb from her toes down.

While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid.

She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

The pelvic examination will be done later on the floor.

Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

Pakeokd kplmnbf is fjehsgf fhfhly wesvkling.

Jump to Doctor Joke Number:
| 10 | 20 | 30 | 40 | 50 | 60 | 70 |
| 80 | 90 | 100 | 110 | 120 | 130 |
| New Doctor Jokes |

Nurse Jokes
Click for Nurse Jokes