That #%$%! Boss Jokes

Things Your Boss Would Never Say:

"That client was wrong to be mad at you... We're not going to do business with them anymore."

"I double paid you by accident... Oh well, just keep it - you deserve it."

"You have cramps?... Here, take the day off, and here's some money to go shopping too!"

"Sure... you can bring your cat with you to work."

"Oh dear, your kids are sick? Here, I'll pay the medical bill since our insurance here sucks."

"Help yourself to a 2 hour lunch."

"You only want to take a ONE week vacation? Hell, take TWO!"

"You're sick? Go home and take the rest of the week off."

"You're allowed 10 personal phone calls a day."

"Sure we can afford that $3000 ergonomically correct chair for you!"

"Look, I gotta make this meeting quick so I can get back and answer the phones."

"Since it's so nice outside, let's work out there."

"I'm going to promote you because I like you."

"It's okay to take a nap at your desk."

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