Lawyer and Attorney Jokes

Q: How many lawyer jokes are there?
A: Three... The rest are true stories.

Q: Why to lawyers wear neckties?
A: To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.

Q: Why are lawyers great in bed?
A: They get so much practice screwing people.

Q: What is the difference between a hooker and a lawyer?
A: A hooker will stop screwing you when you're dead.

Q: What do lawyers use as contraceptives?
A: Their personalities.

Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?
A: A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

Q: What does a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
A: Both have about a 1-in-3 million chance of becoming a human being.

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